office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize