Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
wow bdsm is so cute
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
