yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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