don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
