She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
