how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
i black out too much to be "responsible"
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
