I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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