Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
home. puking in laundry basket.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
