he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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