Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
