Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
