Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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