I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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