Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
