You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
