Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
