Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
