I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
