I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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