He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
