I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
