You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
