No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
