But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
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