it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
