i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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