Ambien. No doubt about it.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Randomize
