All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize