She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize