I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
