yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
