in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
