Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
