i just wanna soil my oats bro
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
