im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
