he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize