It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
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