I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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