i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
