What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
