I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize