I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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