your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
