Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
