I want to stick my p in your. b.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize