yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
