He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
well you can't waste a boner
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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