worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
