I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
