absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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