UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Randomize