I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
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